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Pale Boobs and Shiny Faces

I was going to use this picture because their shiny faces look funny, but I'm going to go against everything I believe in and recommend that the girl on the left use some fake tanner on her pale boobs. She probably doesn't wear exposing clothes that often, unlike that slut on the right, so she could use some tanning lotion to even out her color. Gasp, I can't believe that I just told someone to get a partial fake tan, what is this world coming to. Also, is that a lit cigarette between the right chick's boobs?

I was going to use this picture because their shiny faces look funny, but I'm going to go against everything I believe in and recommend that the girl on the left use some fake tanner on her pale boobs. She probably doesn't wear exposing clothes that often, unlike that slut on the right, so she could use some tanning lotion to even out her color. Gasp, I can't believe that I just told someone to get a partial fake tan, what is this world coming to. Also, is that a lit cigarette between the right chick's boobs?


Similar tanners:
It looks like the length of her tank tops is the exact same, all that changes is the strap style. In theory switching the placement of the straps would eliminate any tan lines you got from them, she did something wrong here. Maybe I'm wrong in assuming that these tan lines came from two separate occasions. The only other option is that she wore both tank tops at the same time! I know what you're thinking, I'm a stupid man and didn't realize those could be from bra straps. Well you couldn't be more wrong! She's wearing a bra right now and the tan lines don't match with the straps so it was double tank tops that caused this. Case closed.
Double Tank Top Tan Lines
Ok, the conspiracy theorist in me is telling me that these three ladies didn't get to be the same color by accident. Now it's either one of two things, they're friends and like to spray tan together or management has an off the books spray tan policy. I don't think you can legally require anyone to spray tan, so these 3 probably got tan because they think it makes them look better. Of course beautification wasn't the goal, it's because of the fact that more attractive servers make more money and get promoted sooner. Wait, if they get promoted sooner that means the Hooters corporate office has the hottest of all the Hooters girls? How have I never heard of this before, now that's a conspiracy! I'm off to Atlanta to investigate further.
Mandatory Dress Code
You see that little bit of pale under her eyes, that's from where the goggles go when she tans. Unlike everyone else that leaves the goggles off to get a better tan she values her sight, that's doing it right. Finally someone gets that a continuous tan isn't worth going blind. Like you'll really be able to appreciate your tan when you can't see anything. And no, you can't just eat a bunch of carrots to make up for the damage done by all the UV rays. Although baby carrots are much cuter they won't help any either, so you better wear the goggles. Here's the deal, if you don't wear the goggles I can practically guarantee you a lifetime supply of stubbed toes.
UV Tanning Done Right
Sure she's about the tannest woman I've ever seen, but that could still be natural. Of course she would have to live in the sunniest place in the world, which is apparently Arizona, be outside every single minute of every single day and use mirrors and magnifying glasses to concentrate the sun onto her skin, but it's possible. No it's not, of course her tan is fake, what I was actually asking about in the title is whether or not that guys smile is fake? Her wide grin shows that she's enjoying his company, but his jaw is clenched, his teeth aren't showing, and there's no wrinkles around his eyes. It's a fake smile, I knew it! He probably knows how long it's going to take to clean whatever's on her skin off his shirt, if that's even possible.
Do You Thinks It's Fake?
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