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Something about her face looks fake

I just can't put my finger on what it is about this woman that makes me think she's fake. It can't be her tan, because that is totally natural, it's definitely not her lips, because they're just like normal lips, and there's no way her eyebrows could be drawn on with a sharpie. I guess I'm just as surprised as she is that I can't figure her all natural look out.

I just can't put my finger on what it is about this woman that makes me think she's fake. It can't be her tan, because that is totally natural, it's definitely not her lips, because they're just like normal lips, and there's no way her eyebrows could be drawn on with a sharpie. I guess I'm just as surprised as she is that I can't figure her all natural look out.


Similar tanners:
She's so tan it's almost a guarantee it's fake, but is that what's really causing it to look like she has a moustache? We really should get some of those Bigfoot experts from TV in here to consult on this because they're really good at making conclusions from even the tiniest shred of proof. They're also really good at looking at blurry photos, they could tell me in a millisecond whether that's a real moustache or some stray fake tanner. I'm afraid I couldn't get ahold of them in time so I'll have to make the call myself. Bigfoot is real people, he's out there! That's him in the back right! He showed up at the club because he probably thought she was like him with that moustache.
Is It Really Her Tan?
Oh look, it's another tan bodybuilder, what a surprise. While a tan bodybuilder is nothing new, this one's coloring looks more natural. Gasp!. He probably spends 3 hours a day working on his muscles, 3 hours working on his tan, and the remaining 18 hours checking himself out in every mirror in the gym. If this idea of natural tanning catches on with other bodybuilders the entire fake tanning economy could collapse.
Surprise! Another tan bodybuilder
Don't be fooled, he's not looking at the camera, he's looking at his own reflection in a mirror. At the tanning salon he didn't think he looked this dark, it must be the lighting in the club. He's probably regretting his decision to opt for the face and chest only package, just look at his arms. Other than the lack of arm tan I'd say his GTL cycle is pretty solid, maybe a little off the G and some more T and he could be a role model for aspiring guidos.
Surprised by His Own Tan
She gave spray tanning a good shot but this one is definitely a do-over. In fact she should probably schedule her do-over for a couple hundred years from now. I'm not saying she shouldn't try again because everyone deserves a second chance, I'm saying she should procrastinate indefinitely. It's so easy everyone should try it. For example, I know I have to clean my room so I've got it scheduled it for 2050. In the meantime I'm not messy, I'm a forward thinker. The same goes for her. She doesn't suck at spray tanning, she's just experiencing delayed success. If she gives up trying and delays a re-try until far in the future I'd consider that a success.
It Might Be A Do-Over
3 Comments on this post
Trey2012-06-12

I love your blog. I read it all the time, and I have no idea why!! I don't tan myself, and I think the look is absolutely ridiculous... I mean who would PAY to get skin cancer and look like an oompah loompah (remember they are the servants of the wonka world).... And don't even mention how much effing time would have to be spent to get that gold-dusted marzipan look... i mean my god

Amanda2013-01-24

Maybe it is her penis?

Calinda2013-11-28

It's a man!! duh!

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